Focus on The Solution

This one is going to take me a bit, but if you bear with my I promise I'll do my best to make it worth your while.

If you use facebook even once every few days, you know how it goes. You log on and maybe your eye goes immediately to the number of messages or notifications you have or the "on this day" however many years ago suggested post facebook gives you. From that point, if you even scroll for 3 or more posts down your news feed there's an... I would guess 80% chance you'll see something that either uses profanity, complains, has a racy or sarcastic joke or picture or it's a news or blog article or video that gives society yet another thing to be sad, annoyed or angry about something.

It's ridiculous and feeds the plague of constant nagging we all see (on the internet or otherwise) to react, react, react without thinking for two seconds. The loudest voices these days are saying "listen to my woes! Hear ye, hear ye, I have something negative to say and doth require everyone to listen to how I feel about it!" Someone always has something bad to say. By the end of each day - and I kid you not, this is not an exaggeration - there is always at least one person or page or something else on facebook that someone shares that goes through the following process.

1. Hide the post,
2. Possibly report it for advocating something immoral, dishonest or manipulative, fully expecting facebook's staff or algorithms to completely brush it off as no big deal
3. Click the three dot menu and select "Hide all from [insert name of third party page or person here]"

I have continued this process for well over a year now, partly because of how much I have been trying to weed out all the mind-numbing, time-wasting, stupid distractions people share, but also to eventually (hopefully) eliminate everything from my feed that is not edifying and good for my own spiritual health.

Now, I'm aware that the way I have started this seems a bit counter-intuitive to what I titled this entry, so I'll start to turn this around now.

I totally understand that burying our heads in the sand and turning a blind eye to people's suffering is wrong. However, we also need to understand that one of Satan's most effective weapons is to overwhelm us with negativity and bring to our attention as many reasons as he can to focus on problems we cannot solve on our own. I've deliberately and vigorously been working on how I respond to negativity, a frown on someone's face, a stranger with a bad attitude, a corrupt politician, or even someone with a valid point and good intentions but who still has nothing but negative to say (even in the name of humor) in the moment.

My number one impulse over the last year has increasingly been to find any reason or method I can to respond to those people constructively, focusing on a solution and addressing their concern but in a way that encourages positive thinking and love toward others.

Because as far as the devil is concerned, as long as we are not actively focused on doing good, he couldn't care less if we are involved in grievous sins of commission or omission.

My efforts have required me to change the kinds of comments I give attention to and the conversations online I choose to be a part of. As an example, a while back I used to find Matt Walsh a catalyst for constructive conversation and problem solving, but I don't pay attention to almost anything he says anymore. I already know how far away from the doctrine of Christ and reality itself most churches today are straying. I've heard quite enough of how celebrities, clergy, politicians or "that person in that viral video" are completely abandoning common sense and cherry-picking which parts of scripture they want to follow.

Even when I'm not online there are so many mind numbing, time wasting, and even straight up evil things I'm constantly trying to combat and the method is the same. Focus on the solution and be more aware of which things are truly edifying and which are not. I think I'm starting to get a little better at it, too. My wife and I have become better at recognizing when we are rationalizing by making excuses to allow certain unholy and impure sources of entertainment into our home. We both wanted to see what the new show Titan Games (with Dwayne Johnson) was all about, but when my wife rightfully pointed out that the way they dress the women is completely unnecessary and revealing, we decided to avoid it. I also noticed recently how many times the devil tries to make cheap shots by subtly sneaking horrible messages into good causes. There is a new Weight Watchers commercial that uses a catchy beat and tune, but the lyrics are horrific!

And baby, worship me
Worship me
On your knees
Patiently, quietly, faithfully, worship me

The solution? Turn our attention more frequently and vigorously to God, the One we should really be worshiping.

-Perhaps replace the impulse to mock those with contrasting political views behind their back and make contemptuous jokes about them with an impulse to see what you have in common with them, and if there is truly a necessity to address evil intentions and actions, do so in a way that seeks to understand their heart and perspective. Only when we truly understand others can we begin to show them love in a way that a) they will accept and appreciate and b) will cause a desire within them to change their hearts. Back in 1972, Elder Marvin J. Ashton recalled a fantastic example of this from the life of President Abraham Lincoln.

"President Abraham Lincoln was once criticized for his attitude toward his enemies. 'Why do you try to make friends of them?' asked an associate. 'You should try to destroy them.'
'Am I not destroying my enemies,' Lincoln gently replied, 'when I make them my friends?'"

-Rather than hold a grudge against someone, even when we are justified in our hurt feelings, lets try replacing the impulse to dwell on it and gossip about them with a desire to resolve our concerns like adults, candidly and peacefully; and if those who wrong us don't believe they've done something wrong or just aren't ready to make things right, let's not allow them to live in our heads rent free. One of my most deeply held beliefs about dealing with toxic people is as follows. "I do not care what you think about me. I just don't and I don't need to. However, I will always, always care how you feel." And I don't. I lost the energy to care about what people think of me a long time ago, but my desire to empathize with how people feel has only grown exponentially over the years.

-Instead of emphasizing over and over and over and over and over again the corruption of "Billy John Bob" over in yonder country, let's avoid fighting fire with fire and instead simply teach the good things we know to be true. To combat people's effort to try and destroy people's lives and families, let's take every opportunity to spread the divine value of the human soul and eternal family relationships and then exemplify those ideas in how we live and treat those around us.

_________________________

There are any more examples I could rattle off about how to respond to negativity in a way that is constructive, edifying and love. But if I did this article would be way too long to keep anyone's attention all the way through.

Let's talk about good and then go out and do good.

Learning From Example

During my scripture study this morning, I was in Alma 15 where Alma and Amulek had just escaped the prison in Ammonihah and went to establish the church in Sidom. When they got there they found out that Zeezrom, having realized the error of his ways, "lay sick at Sidom with a burning fever, which was caused by the great tribulations of his mind on account of his wickedness... and [his sins] did harrow up his mind until it did become exceedingly sore, having no deliverance; therefore he began to be scorched with a burning heat." (Alma 15:3)

I thought about that for a while and then considered the result of that kind of repentance, which it goes over in a more detail in verses 5 - 12, where "...they found him upon his bed, sick, being very low with a burning fever; and his mind also was exceedingly sore because of his iniquities; and when he saw them he stretched forth his hand, and besought them that they would heal him.

"And it came to pass that Alma said unto him, taking him by the hand: Believest thou in the power of Christ unto salvation?

"And he answered and said: Yea, I believe all the words that thou hast taught.

"And Alma said: If thou believest in the redemption of Christ thou canst be healed.

"And he said: Yea, I believe according to thy words.

"And then Alma cried unto the Lord, saying: O Lord our God, have mercy on this man, and heal him according to his faith which is in Christ.

"And when Alma had said these words, Zeezrom leaped upon his feet, and began to walk; and this was done to the great astonishment of all the people; and the knowledge of this went forth throughout all the land of Sidom.

"And Alma baptized Zeezrom unto the Lord; and he began from that time forth to preach unto the people."

The cause and effect of this story in my mind got me feeling a much greater desire to make every time I repent like this instance with Zeezrom. He felt 100% true Godly sorrow so much that he wanted to abandon his sins and received forgiveness, as President Russell M. Nelson would say, "with the same intensity that a drowning person has when grasping and gasping for air." How often is my repentance like that? How often is any of our repentance really like that? Rarely. But look at the result! That kind of repentance permanently changed Zeezrom's life for the better. Imagine how much happier we could be, how much more peace and unity with God we could have if we wanted to abandon our sins (of commission and omission) as intensely as a drowning person grasping for air!

That should be a hashtag, seriously. #repentlikeZeezrom. But on that note, why not look at other examples of gospel principles in the scriptures? Let's take a look at a few.

#gratitudelikeAmmon

In the spirit of Thanksgiving week (at least for the U.S.), studying Alma 26 provides a fantastic example of humble gratitude for the blessings of missionary work, making others happy, the love and mercy of God, sacrifice and more. Here are just a few of the expressions of gratitude he gives after asking his companions, "I ask, what great blessings [God] has bestowed upon us? Can ye tell?"

Verse 3, "We have been made instrument in the hands of God to bring about this great work. Behold, thousands of them do rejoice, and have been brought into the fold of God."

Verse 12, "I know that I am nothing; as to my strength i am weak; therefore I will not boast of myself, but I will boast of my God, for in [H]is strength I can do all things; yea, behold, many mighty miracles we have wrought in this land, for which we will praise [H]is name forever."

Verse 14, "Yea, we have reason to praise [H]im forever, for [H]e is the Most High God, and has loosed our brethren from the chains of hell."

Verse 17, "Who could have supposed that our God would have been so merciful as to have snatched us from our our awful, sinful, and polluted state?" (italics added)

And all this gratitude was in spite of the mocking and ridicule his own people shot at him. He recounted it, saying "they laughed us to scorn [and] said unto us: Do ye suppose that ye can bring the Lamanites to the knowledge of the truth? Do ye suppose that ye can convince the Lamanites of the incorrectness of the traditions of their fathers, as [stubborn] a people as they are; whose hearts delight in the shedding of blood; whose days have been spend in the grossest iniquity...?"

This didn't deter Ammon. He was thankful for the chance and his efforts were certainly not wasted.

#faithlikeMohonri

More commonly known as The Brother of Jared, Mohonri's story is unique in a number of ways. First, he left for the Americas even before Abram was named Abraham so he wouldn't have even had the pentateuch (five books of Moses) like the Israelites and Lehi did when Lehi left Jerusalem. All he probably had was whatever records there were at the time of God's dealings with His children from Adam up to just after Noah and the flood. He wouldn't have had nearly as many records of prophets testimonies of Jesus Christ as the Nephites had when the Jaredite nation was founded.

With that in mind, remember the story of his asking the Lord to touch the 16 stones and what unexpectedly came of that experience. When the Lord showed Mohonri His spirit body, He said to him "never have I showed myself unto man whom I have created, for never has man believed in me as thou hast." In fact, so great was His faith that Moroni mentioned (and keep in mind this was written after 400 A.D.)  that up to the time when Moroni wrote it, "there never were greater things made manifest than those which were made manifest unto the brother of Jared." He knew this because "the Lord [had] commanded [him] to write them..." and include them in the sealed portion of the plates Joseph Smith had.

Imagine how much faith it would take to make it so that a prophet would write about your faith "he could not be kept from beholding within the veil;" For now I merely aspire to attain this level of faith, in mind, heart and action and hope to one day get to that point.

#charityliketheAmmonites

If you've ever read the Tennis Shoes Among the Nephites series by Chris Heimerdinger, you may remember the part where it mentions that Garth always considered Ammon the greatest missionary of all time. I think there's a good reason for that idea being included in those books. It takes a missionary like Ammon to instill such an incredible love in a people like the converted Lamanites who were later called Ammonites. They were, as Mormon mentions, "distinguished for their zeal towards God and also towards men;...and they did look upon shedding the blood of their brethren with the greatest abhorrence... they would suffer death in the most aggravating and distressing manner which could be inflicted by their brethren, before they would take the sword or cimeter to smite them."

How many people do you know who couldn't, even if their life depended on it, lift a finger or a single word against another human being? Do you know anyone who can't stand the thought of doing or saying anything to hurt another person, even the rapist, the hater, the murderer, the pornographer, the liar, or the abuser? The Ammonites learned to love everyone to the point where, while they would never even entertain the idea of abandoning their faithful and diligent lifestyle, they also would never dream of hurting someone who hated or hurt them because of their faith.

There are a few others I can think of, but I don't have the time to go over them right now. But just think of totally Christ-like examples of other virtues and how you can exemplify those virtues in a similar way in your own life. Heck, when you share this, perhaps pick your favorite or do one of your own.

#humilitylikeKingBenjamin (Mosiah 2:10-26)
#patiencelikeAlma (Alma 14:14-end)
#obediencelikeNephi (1 Nephi 3:15; 4:6-7 and 2 Nephi 33:15)
#diligencelikeJacob (Jacob 2:9-11)
#hopelikeHelaman (Alma 58:33-37)