A Special Connection

This last Sunday my wife and I were going through some of the new Come, Follow Me manual and in the third lesson for January there is a video that focuses on how Joseph felt as he helped raise The Messiah. As I was watching and read about it and I was dumbstruck by the portrayal of how he felt when Jesus was missing on their way back from Jerusalem. I don't know how to explain this very well, but it was as if all of the sudden I could feel Joseph's love for his step Son, his understanding of who He was and the resulting overwhelming anxiety he felt, knowing who Jesus was and that they had lost Him. I could feel so strongly the enormous responsibility he felt for keeping this Holy Boy safe and teaching Him, the best he knew how, the righteous traditions of his forefathers.

I felt in that moment an empathy for him like I had never felt for any other mortal father. I could feel the urgency in his efforts to get himself and Mary back to Jerusalem as fast as possible to make sure Jesus was okay. When I watched the video and saw the look on Joseph's face when Jesus said "wist ye not that I must be about my Father's business?" realizing what he meant, I felt like Joseph's expression almost yelled "how could I have forgotten that? I am only His mortal guardian. I need to be more humble about this. I should have known."

The contrast I felt between a) his absolute and intense sense of love duty to provide for and protect his wife and the Son of God and b) his realization that his role in Jesus' life was only temporary was so overwhelming for me that it got me thinking about the parallels in my own life that seemed to fit this moment of clarity for me like a brand new lock and key.

Joseph instinctually acted with an urgency the totally rocked me. Finding Jesus was of pivotal importance to him. I began asking myself: Are my actions mirroring the faith, love and loyalty I say I feel for my God, my wife, my family and friends? How can I better transfer how I feel about what matters most into my habits?

I see the example President Nelson is showing of following the Lord's counsel without regard to what is convenient or what others say about him and I wish I was doing better at that myself. Well, my readers, I don't know about you, but today I have felt a huge but gentle push from God to go against the grain of my natural instincts and replace more of my unholy habits with Godly ones.

I was recently listening to a podcast with Chad Daybell where he was talking about what will be required of today's youth and he said the following: "[our youth] will have to be stronger than the stripling warriors, and the reason I say that is because the stripling warriors only had to worry about one side of that kingdom, the physical side, because they were raised in a Zion-like society. They didn't have the problems with pornography, [] multiculturalism, [] drugs, gender-identity, [] socialism, they didn't have all these... just bombardment of satanistic attitudes that are coming at our kids left and right."

I see a great irony in this. We perceive, and justly so, these amazing examples of faith and endurance from saints and prophets from long ago. We have songs that say things like "I'll have faith like brother Joseph [Smith] and the strength of the pioneers. I'll be brave as the stripling warriors and, like Nephi, persevere." Yet there is that statement by Chad Daybell which is spot on.

How many of those anciently who we look up to are watching us today in both utterly unanticipated horror as well as dumbfounding wonder and joy with the levels of wickedness and righteousness they see in humanity today? My own patriarchal blessing says my heritage (which is rich with faithful examples in church history) will guide me in my determination to do everything within my power to be faithful and obedient to the Lord's will.

That... connection I guess you could call it, that I felt from Joseph was a huge reminder to me that my desire to be faithful in everything the Lord has asked me personally to do needs to increase exponentially. And I'll will going about that just the way the Lord told me to in my patriarchal blessing, by focusing on carrying on my family legacy of faith and loyalty to my God, my wife and my covenants. And I hope this has inspired someone else to do the same.

We're Doing Christmas Differently This Year

This month back in November 2015 I wrote about Christmas and explained why the holiday still deserves to be treated by the mass public as the divine, special time of year it deserves to be. No matter how many people stop caring about it, there is always a reason to make a bigger deal out of Christmas.

With that in mind, this one is to explain why my wife and I are doing Christmas differently this year. Each previous year we put a big effort into make the usual things associated with Christmas special; the tree, the gifts, the music, the food and always going above and beyond our usual routine to do some extra nice things for some friends and even a few complete strangers. But this time a few things have happened recently, both horrific and beautifully amazing, that have changed our objectives in our celebration of the birth, life and mission of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.

Big changes in life often require us to accept that certain things about ourselves - habits, beliefs, attachment to certain traditions - may not entirely align with the will of the Lord for our lives. Such has happened for us this year.

In the last few months we have upped our regular spiritual feast. Our prayers are changing to include more praise, gratitude, sorrow for sin and pleading for God to help us shift our priorities towards things that will change us into a Zion couple. Our fears about Lorraine's health have been steadily diminishing with each passing year because of the spiritual experiences we have had individually and together and we want, more than ever before, to become willing to accept whatever hard changes the Lord is going to ask us to make, to abandon whatever habit, tradition, routine or expectation He asks us to in order to become more like Him.

A few of those things we are changing this year are a part of our Christmas celebration. We'll be cutting back on how much focus we put on gifts, a tree, and "fun stuff" this year and more focus on how much we can do and be for each other and others. We'll be looking for every opportunity to brighten someone's day and #lighttheworld. Jesus made His entire life and still makes everything He does about us and giving us every opportunity to have and become the absolute best and, in doing so, gave us the best possible gift anyone ever could. So, in turn, Lorraine and I are making this Christmas about bringing others as much joy as we possibly we can and making our home a place where people can feel Jesus' love for them strongly enough that they want more than anything to know Him better and want to be like Him, no matter the cost.

How better to celebrate Him on Christmas than to be as much like Him as possible and show love to Him by loving others? We're still going to be doing something with gifting, we have decorations of up course and we did do our usual gingerbread house tradition. However, the more we talk about certain common Christmas traditions, the more I consider with brutal honesty the real reason why I like those traditions, I realize that some of them have been more for me about doing the "generally accepted, fun" Christmas thing than doing it in actual celebration of the birth of my Savior. Some traditions I know for sure are more for the sake of celebrating Him than just for fun, but others are not. In the last few weeks, I have become more willing to abandon some, change others and begin new ones as well, better ones that are more focused on Jesus Christ and helping those around me feel His love.

Just think of how much more amazing this world would be if we truly applied to following counsel from 2 Nephi 32:9 where it says "But behold, I say unto you that ye must pray always, and not faint; that ye must not perform any thing unto the Lord save in the first place ye shall pray unto the Father in the name of Christ, that he will consecrate thy performance unto thee, that thy performance may be for the welfare of thy soul."

This verse has always served as a reminder for me ask myself the following question with everything I do, "can I do this in Christ's name or not?" In the case of Christmas celebrations, the question changes to "is [insert tradition here] in celebration of the Savior or just because it's fun and everyone else does it?"

Being brutally honest about this question recently has actually been refreshingly awakening.

I invite you to try it as well and I look forward to seeing the positive changes that will hopefully happen within Lorraine and I and in our home. Merry Christmas everyone :)

What Do The Things You Are Focused On Say About You?

Since this year isn't over quite yet, I couldn't look up the most popular google search for 2015 worldwide, but in 2014 it was Robbin Williams.  Others in the top ten included Ebola, Ice Bucket Challenge and ISIS.  To be perfectly honest, this is actually quite comforting to me.  This may seem strange to some, especially my regular readers, considering my entry about what types of things we should be comfortable with, but hear me out.

Of course, Robbin Williams death was a really sad thing to all who loved him around the world, there was tons of controversy about the Ice Bucket Challenge and ISIS -- well that's just never a pleasant subject.  But the fact that these were among the most searched things on the planet says something about humanity in general.  To me, it says that if you look at the entirety of the world population, at humanity as a whole, we care about each other and seek for each other's well being and safety.  I think it shows the overwhelming, innate desire that God put in each of us to care for each other, to make sure we are all safe and happy as much as possible.

From a Latter-Day Saint perspective, this matches the Plan of Salvation perfectly.  The Book of Mormon so effectively reminds us that "men are that they might have joy", that "it must needs be, that there is an opposition in all things. If not so,... righteousness could not be brought to pass, neither wickedness, neither holiness nor misery, neither good nor bad."

But going back to my main train of thought, based, at least, on the most frequent concerns of people worldwide as reflected by google (among other sources as well), God's plan is going forward well.  People are, at the core and as a whole, focused on finding happiness, the very thing God intended us to be, even if they don't know exactly how to find it.  Latter-day scripture emphasizes this point further: "For there are many yet on the earth ... are blinded by the subtle craftiness of men, whereby they lie in wait to deceive, and who are only kept from the truth because they know not where to find it"

But let's get down to brass tacks now.  The world at large is still focused on happiness, but where are you or I or those closest to us focused?  The Lord tells us that "For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he."  Yes, we will all be distracted from moment to moment and from day to day, but is the general direction we are heading leading us away from or toward the ultimate happiness the Lord has in store for us?

W Network is great this time of year because they have a ton of Christmas specials on that focus people's attention to things the Savior taught, like integrity, honesty, combating fear and hurt with faith and hope, etc.  As a kid I was, understandably so at that age, focused a lot on getting "stuff" for Christmas.  My mom had to actually either give us money and say this is for you to go and buy something for [enter sibling's name here] for Christmas or even go out and buy something from them for us to give to them and say "this is from you to them, so go wrap it up yourself and put that it's from you and put it under the tree" just to get us to even think about what we could give to others.  It's not something I'm proud of, but it says a lot about what really mattered to me as a kid.

Well, my perspective has drastically changed since then and the things that make me happy now are much different from back then.  I try so hard every year to think of something I can get or do for my wife without her knowing so the look on her face on Christmas day can be so happy I'll never forget for the rest of eternity.  However, she's very creative with her questions to me and she ends up finding out about most things she gets, if not all of them, every year.  There's still one thing I have planned for this year that she doesn't know about yet so I hope it stays that way.  But either way, my priorities are so different from how they used to be that I feel much better about what my focus says about me know compared to, heck, even as recently as 5 years ago.

It's nowhere even close to what I want it to be and I have so much to improve on that sometimes I wonder if my future self, say 10 years from now, would look at me and just shake his head in shame, but I know for a fact that I'm on the right track, that where I want to be, the kind of person I'm trying to turn into now is nowhere near as petty and selfish as were my aspirations 10 years ago.

I think it's healthy to give, minimum, a good 10 to 30 minutes a day just reflecting on what our priorities are saying about, or doing some kind of self evaluation.  Would you rather spend your Sundays doing something with some kind of commercial emphasis or give every effort to strengthen your relationship with our Father in Heaven?  Would you have the courage to turn down a business transaction on the Sabbath or kindly encourage a random stranger to stop smoking?  Is social media or the scriptures more appealing to you personally?  Do other's successes (especially when it would have been your success) bring you joy or envy?  Are you likely to use expletives (profane or not) when angry or frustrated?  You can find questions like these at the end of chapter 6 of Preach My Gospel and they are a fabulous way to get a good idea of what needs improvement.

Please don't get depressed because of this.  My purpose here isn't to in any way do a rewrite of Alma 5.  Rather, it is just to make us think about both ends of the spectrum, where we are doing right and where we can improve.  What do the things you are focused on say about you?

Christmas Has Not Become Commercialized. Society Has.

It's the one time of year the world seems to be a little more socially healthy, when people are a little more kind in general, a little more giving, patient and loving.  Christmas is awesome.  It's the best holiday of the year bar none.  Yet so many (especially this year it seems to me) convey an attitude of diminishing Christmas because it's "too soon" or even dreading it because of all the commercialism sparked by the holiday.  This makes no sense to me if you consider what Christmas really is.

Christmas is, in part, about, as Alma said in the Book of Mormon, being "humble... submissive and gentle; easy to be entreated; full of patience and long-suffering; being temperate in all things... diligent in keeping the commandments of God at all times; asking for whatsoever things ye stand in need, both spiritual and temporal; always returning thanks unto God for whatsoever things ye do receive."

Honestly, I'm not sure I could possibly care less about how much stores and the media are making business off the Christmas season.  That's their business and their prerogative.  That shouldn't be, though, a reason for everyone else to buy into it or even get all up in arms about the holiday just because they are "ruining" it for some.  Yes, sometimes it gets annoying how much others try to shift the focus of Christmas away from Christ and more towards "stuff", but honestly, the responsibility is ours and ours alone to decide where our focus is centered.  Not even God, in all His majesty, might and power, will ever force the human mind and heart to feel or think anything that the individual does not choose for themselves.  He invites, always beckoning us with love.  Christ was the epitome of that very principle in this world.  It is He whose birth we celebrate this season.

No matter what anyone else does to make Christmas some kind of business gimmick, competition or contest to see who can make the biggest buck, have the coolest Christmas light display, who gave the best gift, which store had the best sale, who's the best deal finder, what it's really about is the kind of person we can become because of Christ.  It's about coming to know the Master, the ultimate celebration of the Son of God, His eternal love, ministry, life, example, sacrifice and triumph over everything that could bring us down. 

I remember the year my brother put a lot of effort into one of the best gifts he ever got me.  It was the year I discovered Jon Schmidt's piano music.  Someone wanted to see if I could learn his song "All of Me" and I loved it!  My brother found this out and, since he had known about Jon Schmidt's music before I had ever heard of him, he knew I would love a chance to play more of it.  I remember that Christmas morning when I tore the wrapping paper off of the binder in which he put all the PDF's he printed from Jon's website.  I had never seen his picture so when I saw it I didn't recognize who he was.  It was when my brother said "read the front cover" that my heart may as well have skipped a beat and, I assume, my face lit up.  It was one of the few times where I was utterly speechless with excitement.  My dad actually said "speechless, for once!" (har har dad).  I was so overcome with joy in his thoughtfulness and my mom told me later that he said my reaction was one of the best Christmas gifts he ever received.

I speak of this because it wasn't so much the materialism of the what he had bought me (though to this day I still frequently enjoy playing out of that binder), what why he did.  He knew what would mean a lot to me.  He knew that piano is one of most pronounced gifts from God to me and that the value of more means to develop that gift would have eternal value to me.  I never doubted how much he cared about me as his brother, but after that it only solidified and strengthened my trust in his concern for my happiness.  That Christmas, for me, was a powerful reminder that putting someone else's happiness ahead of our own, the way the Savior did, is really the object of the Christmas season.  It's about making Christ and mirroring His life the core of the season.  I believe I have come a long way with that in my life, and I still have a long way to go as well, but when I have actually done it right, there is nothing except divine love from God to explain the resulting joy of that kind of selflessness.

Satan is so sly with his influence over the business world and the economy.  He has had thousands of years of practice at distracting the world with a plethora of things that, in and of themselves, are completely meaningless in the scope of the individual worth of souls and the core purpose of humanity and mortality.  But, as the prophet Joseph Smith said, "The devil has no power over us, only as we permit him".  It is our choice what we make of Christmas, no matter what anyone else says or does.

Thomas S. Monson put it, as he always does, so brilliantly said:

This flawless, infinitely loving and giving man, Jesus the Christ, our Savior and Redeemer, the force behind everything that is good in this world and in all the eternities to come, is where our focus should be.  We can ignore or at least not get so easily annoyed with those who elect to make their Christmas about materialism and comparison.  If you want to truly find joy in Christmas the way it was meant to be, make it that way yourself, no one else can rob that from you unless you let them.

To those who get annoyed by Christmas music, have elected to not celebrate because they don't like the commercialism identified with the season or for whatever other reason are anything but happy about Christmas, I extend the following invitation.  Get excited!  Be like Buddy the Elf!  Decorate! Give it another chance.  And another, and another, and another... because regardless of what others do or say about the Christmas season, it is for you what you make of it and it always deserves our utmost gratitude, joy and respect because of He who we celebrate during this time of year.

Spread the joy of Christ to the world by making Christmas what it was meant to be within your own heart.